Considering solo motherhood?
You’re not alone.
Across the world, more and more women are asking themselves a simple, life-changing question:
Could I really have a baby on my own?
If you’re here, you’ve already taken the bravest first step - you’re allowing yourself to wonder. Whether you’ve spent years waiting for the right relationship, or you’re suddenly aware that time and biology won’t wait forever, this page is your hand-holding guide through everything that follows.
Where you might be right now
Maybe you’ve found yourself thinking about having a baby on your own. Those thoughts started quietly at first, then get a little louder each day. Maybe you’ve achieved so much in your life, but there’s still a part of you that longs for motherhood. Or perhaps you’re realising that waiting for the “right” relationship isn’t the only way to create the family you’ve always dreamed of.
Wherever you are in your journey, know this: curiosity is powerful.
You don’t need to have it all figured out - you simply need to follow that spark that’s nudging you to explore what’s possible. You’re not crazy for thinking about this. You’re thoughtful, courageous, and starting to take charge of your own story.
This is the moment your “what if” begins to become a “why not?”.
You’re in the right place! Welcome from Alisha Burns, founder of Solo Mum Society and very happy Solo Mum by Choice.
You’re not the only one dreaming of this
All over the world, women are choosing solo motherhood because they’ve realised they don’t need to wait for anyone else to begin the life they want. They are teachers, doctors, creatives, and business owners, who have decided to take control of their timelines and create the families they’ve always imagined. Many have discovered a deep sense of peace and pride once they made the decision to move forward.
Fertility options are improving, donor pathways are well supported, and communities of solo mums by choice are growing every day. Together, these women are reshaping what family looks like and showing that love, security, and intention matter far more than convention.
If you’ve been wondering whether you could really do this, the answer is yes, you can, and you don’t have to do it by yourself.
You can join the free Solo Mum Society Facebook community (for women in Australia and New Zealand) to connect with others who understand what you’re thinking about. You can also listen to real, uplifting stories on the No Need for Prince Charming podcast to hear how other women took the leap and built the lives they dreamed of. And for some women, this journey doesn’t stop at one child. Many in our community choose to expand their families through donor conception after having a child with a partner or as a solo mum. Wherever you are on the path to building your family, you’re welcome here. For some women, this journey doesn’t stop at one child. Many in our community choose to expand their families through donor conception after having a child with a partner or as a solo mum. Wherever you are on the path to building your family, you’re welcome here.
Common questions and fears when you’re considering solo motherhood
It’s normal to have a lot of questions when you start thinking about becoming a solo mum by choice. Every woman in the Solo Mum Society community has felt the same mix of excitement, hope, and uncertainty when she first began to explore this path.
You don’t need to have every answer before you start. Asking questions shows that you care about making thoughtful, informed choices for yourself and your future child. With the right information, support, and connection, those fears start to feel less overwhelming and more like decisions you can approach with confidence and clarity.
Here are some of the most common questions women ask when they’re first considering solo motherhood, along with the truths that often surprise them once they start to explore what’s really possible.
What will people think?
It’s completely natural to worry about how others might react. You might fear being judged or misunderstood, especially by people who don’t know anyone who’s walked this path before. But solo motherhood is becoming more common every day, and most people’s curiosity quickly turns into admiration once they see how intentional and full of love this choice really is.
What matters most is what you think and how you feel about the family you’re creating. When your decision comes from a place of strength and self-trust, it becomes easier to stand tall in it.
If you’d like some reassurance, listen to stories on the No Need for Prince Charming podcast. You’ll hear from women who once felt exactly the same way and now couldn’t imagine their life any other way.
What if I never find love?
Becoming a solo mum doesn’t mean giving up on love. It means choosing not to wait for it before living the life you want. Many women find that once they make this decision, they start to feel more complete and confident within themselves. That self-assurance often opens the door to deeper, healthier relationships later on.
Love can find you in many forms — through your child, your friends, your community, and yes, sometimes even through new romantic connections that arrive once you’re already living your truth.
If you’d like help exploring how this choice could affect your future relationships, the Considering Solo Motherhood course includes space to reflect on identity, boundaries, and what love can look like after you become a mum.
Have I left it too late?
This is one of the most common worries, and it’s completely understandable. Fertility can feel like a ticking clock, and we aren’t taught enough about how short our fertility window is when we are in school, or how hard it can be to get pregnant. The only way to truly know your options is to get the right information, have some fertility tests done and engage a fertility specialist as soon as possible to understand the options available for your unique fertility situation. Many women in their late 30s and early 40s go on to conceive successfully using donor conception.
Until you know your specific situation don’t assume you have missed your chance. Knowledge is power, and understanding your fertility gives you the clarity to make confident choices about what comes next.
Start giving yourself the best chances of success by downloading the guide “10 Diet & Lifestyle Tips to Boost Your Fertility” and if you’re in Australia use the Solo Mum Society 20% discount at City Fertility to take the first step toward finding out where you stand.
I’m scared of choosing a donor
Every woman feels nervous about this part at first. It can feel like such a big responsibility — and it is — but it also becomes one of the most meaningful parts of your story. You’re not choosing a father; you’re choosing a small but vital piece that helps bring your dream to life.
It can be overwhelming deciding whether to ask someone you know, find a known donor through a Facebook group or app, or to use a donor through a clinic you are choosing from information on a piece of paper. There are pros and cons to each option, but ultimately you want to make the choice that is best for you and your future child. You also want to make sure if you are using an unregulated donor channel that you are following a good process to protect everyone involved, no matter what the future holds.
The Considering Solo Motherhood course walks you through everything step by step, and the No Need for Prince Charming podcast includes stories from donors and donor-conceived adults so you can hear real perspectives before you decide.
Can I afford this?
Money is one of the biggest concerns for almost everyone who considers this path. You don’t have to be wealthy to become a solo mum, but you do need to plan and prepare. Many women are surprised by how manageable it becomes when they take it one step at a time and seek advice from others who’ve done it before.
You’ll find plenty of practical ideas inside the Considering Solo Motherhood course - budgeting, costs for treatment, maternity leave and other costs to factor in you may not have considered.
Can I handle doing this alone?
Even though you might be doing this without a partner, you’re not doing it on your own. There’s a whole community of incredible women who are walking the same path, ready to support and encourage you.
If you’re in Australia or New Zealand you’ll find advice, friendship, and emotional support through the private Facebook group, the Bump Membership during pregnancy and The Nest Membership once your baby arrives. It’s not about doing everything yourself; it’s about creating your own version of a village.
Will my child miss out without a dad?
This is a question every solo mum asks herself at some point. The truth is that children thrive in homes where they feel safe, loved, supported and wanted — and that has nothing to do with how many parents are in the house.
Your child will grow up knowing they were deeply wanted, intentionally conceived, and surrounded by love. They’ll have positive male role models in other parts of life that you can choose, but what shapes them most will be the security and connection they feel with you.
My Perfect Family is a beautiful way to start sharing your story from the very beginning, helping your child understand that every family is different, and every family is perfect in its own way. It’s also a fantastic gift for your friends, extended family, childcare and school to help all families understand the beauty of diverse families and normalise the language associated with donor conception early on.
What if it doesn’t work?
Fertility treatment can be overwhelming, unpredictable, and it’s natural to worry about the outcome, especially since there are no guarantees. Try to remember that every step you take brings you closer to clarity and to understanding your body and your options. Many women need more than one round of treatment, and others explore donor eggs, embryos, surrogacy or adoption later on. None of that means failure — it’s part of the process.
The most important thing to remember is that you don’t have to go through it alone. There’s support for every stage, from specialists, coaching, support communities, and podcasts that share real experiences. The first step should always be undertaking some initial testing and meeting with a fertility specialist to understand your unique fertility situation and your options (if you’re in Australia you can save 20% if you choose City Fertility for your treatment).
What if I feel lonely?
Solo motherhood can feel different, but it doesn’t have to feel lonely. Many women confess that before they became a mum they felt incredible lonely, but after having children, loneliness isn’t a word they would use to describe their life. The Solo Mum Society community is filled with women who understand exactly what you’re going through. Many have met lifelong friends through our online spaces, local meetups, and even our Bali group holidays.
Connection changes everything. When you surround yourself with people who get it, you realise you were never really alone at all.
The beautiful truth about solo motherhood
What starts as a quiet “what if” often becomes the most empowering decision of your life.
Solo motherhood isn’t about giving up on something. It’s about choosing yourself, your dream, and your child — without waiting for anyone else’s timing. Across the world, women are creating families built on love, strength, and intention. They’re showing their children what courage looks like, what independence feels like, and how powerful it is to live life on your own terms.
There is so much to celebrate about this path:
You have the freedom to choose your own timing. You no longer have to wait for the right partner or the perfect moment. You can start when it feels right for you.
You’ll discover a strength you didn’t know you had. Solo motherhood invites you to trust yourself deeply and to step into the truest version of who you are.
You’ll create a home built entirely on love. Your child will grow up knowing they were wanted, chosen, and loved before they even existed.
You’ll raise your children based on what’s important to you. You don’t have to compromise or negotiate on what you know is important - from your child’s name, where they go to school, where you holiday, and even on how over the top their birthday parties are.
You’ll find a community that gets it. There’s a whole network of women walking this journey alongside you - women who celebrate the wins, share the struggles, and remind you that you’re never alone.
You’ll show your child what courage looks like. They’ll grow up watching a woman who followed her heart, made brave choices, and built a life full of purpose and joy.
Solo motherhood isn’t Plan B. It’s a conscious, courageous Plan A. It’s proof that family can be created in many beautiful ways — and that love, not circumstance, is what truly makes one.
How Solo Mum Society can support you
When you’re considering solo motherhood, it can feel hard to know where to begin. That’s why I’ve created a space where every step is supported — from the very first thought of “could I really do this?” through to planning your next chapter with clarity and confidence.
Here are some of the ways you can get the information, reassurance, and community you need:
Considering Solo Motherhood Course
This foundational course gives you everything you need to understand donor options, fertility pathways, finances, your emotional readiness and mindset.It’s the best place to start if you’re ready to stop overthinking and start learning what’s truly possible.
🎓 Explore the Course
Solo Mum Society Facebook Community
A private space for women in Australia and New Zealand who are considering or creating their families on their own. It’s where honest conversations happen, fears are eased, and friendships begin.
💬 Join the Community
No Need for Prince Charming Podcast
Real stories from women who’ve walked this path before you, along with insights from fertility specialists, counsellors, and donor-conceived individuals. You’ll find comfort, perspective, and often a little inspiration when you need it most.
🎧 Listen to the Podcast
My Perfect Family Book
A beautiful story to help you explain your family story with pride and positivity when the time comes. It’s also a reminder that there’s no single way to make a family — just the way that’s right for you.
📘 Explore the Book
Free Resources
Download 10 Things I Wish I Knew Before Becoming a Solo Mum or use the 20% City Fertility discount to get started with fertility testing or consultations. Small steps like these can give you the knowledge and confidence to move forward.
💌 Download the Free Guide
Ready to learn what comes next?
If you’re ready to begin fertility treatment or you’re already pregnant on this solo motherhood path, visit the Creating stage for courses, resources and community support tailored just for your next step.
Take your first step
You don’t need to have it all figured out today. You simply need to take one small step towards clarity — and trust that you’ll work the rest out along the way. Whether that step is joining the community, listening to a story that feels familiar, or enrolling in the course, you’re already moving closer to the life you’ve been imagining.
You already have everything you need inside you. The rest is just support, guidance, and the courage to say yes to yourself.
Are you ready to start your family?
Solo Mum Society can help you save 20% on fertility treatment with City Fertility.