Everything I Wish I’d Known Before My Child Started Their First Year of School
Is 2026 the year you become a school mum?
There’s something about your child starting school that hits differently.
You think you’re prepared.
You’ve done childcare. Daycare bags. Drop-offs. Milestones.
And then suddenly, you’re standing in the school uniform aisle thinking, How is this my life now?
The first year of school feels like a big deal — not just for your child, but for you as a parent. There’s excitement, pride, nerves, logistics, and a surprising amount of admin. And if you’re anything like me, there’s also a quiet desire to do it well… without completely losing yourself in the process.
After going through this myself, here are the things I genuinely wish someone had told me before that first year started — the practical stuff, the emotional stuff, and the little things that make everyday life easier.
1. Always have gold coins. Always.
I don’t know who decided that parents of school kids should suddenly need endless gold coins, but here we are.
Dress-ups. Icy poles. Fundraisers. Random school things that require exact change. I never carry cash, so this caught me out more than once.
My advice?
Create a small stash of gold coins early. Keep them somewhere obvious. Put one in your child’s bag too.
Future-you will thank you at 8:45am.
2. Read the newsletters — and act on them immediately
School newsletters are packed with information… and very easy to skim.
Dress-up days, excursions, special events, early finishes — it’s all in there.
As soon as the newsletter comes out:
scan it
pull out anything relevant
put it straight into your calendar
Do not assume you’ll remember. You won’t.
3. If being present matters to you, block school events early
The first year of school is full of moments parents can attend if they want to — sports days, assemblies, concerts, fun runs, inflatable obstacle courses and more.
You don’t have to attend everything.
But if being there matters to you (and it often means a lot to your child), treat these like important appointments.
Block them out early so you have the option.
4. Watch out for early finishes (this nearly caught me)
There will be days when school finishes earlier than usual — especially at the end of term.
They’re always mentioned somewhere.
They’re also very easy to miss.
Double-check term dates and newsletters so you don’t end up scrambling when everyone else is heading to a playdate and you’re still in a meeting.
Ask me how I know.
5. Keep extracurriculars on weekdays if you can
If you have the choice, try to keep extracurricular activities during the week rather than on weekends.
The first year of school is exhausting — for kids and parents.
Keeping weekends free means:
your child has space to properly rest
you can say yes to birthday parties more easily
life feels less rushed overall
Sometimes the best thing you can give your child is downtime.
6. Arrive a little early if there’s a junior playground
If your school has a playground just for younger children, arriving a little early can be a quiet gift.
Kids play.
Parents chat.
Faces become familiar.
It’s one of the easiest ways to build connection — especially if you don’t already know families at the school.
7. Don’t overcomplicate the lunchbox
This is important.
Your lunchbox does not need to be aesthetic.
It does not need to look like Instagram.
If your child is hungry, they will eat.
Aim for:
enough food
some nutrition
things they’ll actually eat
That’s it.
There will be days when it’s crackers, fruit and something quick. That’s okay.
8. Pack an emergency kit — and show them what’s in it
A small emergency kit in your child’s bag can be incredibly reassuring.
Include things like:
spare underwear
sunscreen
band-aids
tissues
a gold coin
a small grounding item (see below)
Show your child what’s in it so they know help is there if they need it. That sense of preparedness can be grounding for both of you.
9. Create a small “love token” for nervous moments
This was one of my favourite things.
I made a tiny heart out of leftover clay and gave it to my daughter. She kept it in her pocket and knew that if she felt nervous, she could hold it and feel connected to me.
It doesn’t need to be fancy.
It just needs to mean something to your child.
10. Talk to your child’s teacher about your family — in a way that feels right to you
If your family looks different — whether you’re a solo mum by choice, a donor-conceived family, or simply not the “default” family structure — it can really help to let your child’s teacher know early on.
This doesn’t have to be heavy or awkward.
It’s simply about:
helping your child feel seen and safe
giving the teacher the language you prefer
avoiding confusing or uncomfortable moments in the classroom
If you’re not sure how to phrase it, I’ve created a simple Letter for the Teacher that you can personalise and share. It takes the pressure off finding the right words.
👉 Download the Letter for the Teacher here
11. Use a book to gently introduce your family if needed
If you’re not aware of any other solo mum by choice or donor-conceived families in your child’s class, a book can be a really powerful tool.
Providing a story that reflects your family:
normalises different family structures
supports inclusive conversations
gives children language for questions that may naturally arise
My Perfect Family was written for exactly this reason — to help children see that families can be created in many ways, all rooted in love and it’s the perfect tool for classrooms and teachers as it normalises the language associated with donor conception and represents so many family structures not often seen in books.
👉 You can find My Perfect Family here
12. Join the parent WhatsApp group (or start one)
If there’s a class WhatsApp group, join it.
If there isn’t one, consider starting it.
They’re useful for:
reminders
lost hats
quick questions
community-building
It’s a low-pressure way to stay connected.
13. Create a birthday present stash early
Birthdays come thick and fast in the first year of school.
Having a small stash of go-to presents at home:
removes last-minute stress
saves money
stops overthinking
Sales are a great time to stock up. I kept simple puzzles on hand — nothing complicated, just reliable.
Also stock up on:
wrapping paper
generic birthday cards (not age-specific)
14. Buy extra uniforms — and reinforce them early
If you can, aim for at least three days’ worth of uniforms.
If dresses are part of the uniform, reinforce the hems as soon as you get them. They will fall down, and things left in a “to sew” pile rarely get done quickly.
A little effort up front saves frustration later.
15. Label everything. Truly everything.
Hats. Jumpers. Drink bottles. Shoes.
If it can be lost, it will be.
Labels save time, money, and sanity.
A final thought
The first year of school is a big transition — but it doesn’t need to be perfect.
You’ll forget things.
You’ll learn as you go.
Your child will adapt faster than you expect.
What matters most isn’t doing everything “right”.
It’s being present, prepared enough, and kind to yourself along the way.
You’ve got this.
And if you have tips of your own, I’d love to hear them — because parents helping parents is how we all get through these years with a bit more ease (and humour).